boxed dinners and fancy mugs.

I moved into my first big-girl apartment last week.  I'm living with some sweet friends of mine, both old and new.
It feels good.  It feels grown-up. and a little strange. and a little lonely.
A couple of nights ago I sat at the kitchen table indian-style thinking about how the mac and cheese on the stove must be my 300th box and how I'll quite possibly use the well worn phrase "poor college student" as an excuse to have another tomorrow.  I have a theory that mac and cheese from a box makes growing up a little easier to do.  So does drinking coffee from fancy mugs.

Lately here in this 3rd floor apartment (did I mention it has a built-in? I enjoy those), It's felt a bit like a monastic experience. The girls and I all have different schedules and so I find myself alone a little more often than I'm comfortable with. This is good too. Why you ask? uhm, I don't know...yet.  But I know that in my recent & sometimes broody loner-ness I'm learning how to sit with God.  No words or requests or asking Him why He won't come to my senses.  Just sitting. Sometimes Indian-style.
And more often than not I could do without the quiet, and so I reach for Pandora or Pinterest or both to silence the silence and think "maybe I'll do that tomorrow..."
He's patient with me.

So, I'm here, leading these "grown-up" days in a tiny apartment and I don't know if I'm all that graceful or good at it.  But I'm happy to have time to grow and to have nail polish as my solitary luxury and I'm more than willing to bet that I'll always have a little growing up to do...kids these days.